The Pass. The Judgement day of plates.

The Pass. The Judgement day of plates.
Bring the finished plates up to the pass for inspection.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

The first day of French Pastry School & Orgasmic Croissants.

First day of Friday Pastry School…. And here it goes…

One of the things I knew I’d have to get adjusted to before even attending this program was waking up early enough to attend school. And yes, I made it on time today. Thank you every much, I think I deserve some kind of treat for today's effort. =D

OKAY! So the first day of school was beyond awesome. First, we had the director of operations, Franco Pacini, speaking to us about the school and their goals. I swear this guy, Mr. Pacini, is something alright. There’s just something about the way he presents himself in front of a crowd of some 70 odd students that just captures your attention to the fullest. He’s quite a witty joker combined with the personality of a motivational speaker, almost like Tony Robbins, except he isn’t as buff and is the French Pastry School version.
I have to say, reading these master chef’s profiles on a piece of paper or online on some website is totally different from meeting them in person. They are way better than I had expected. Being in their presence and hearing them speak of their experiences, and listening to their advices on the first day of school, I already felt honored to be there. (But then again, I did pay about $22,000+ on tuitions) BUT that’s not the point!! It kind of hit me in the midst of our introductions that, sitting in front of me, or even just in the room next to us, are some of the world’s BEST master pastry chefs and world pastry champions.

Note the key words “MASTER” and “WORLD PASTRY CHAMPS”. You dig??

Alright, so cut to the good stuff. We were told that there were croissants baked for us at the end of the class, and that we wouldn’t find any other croissants that tasted as divine as these. Sure. I get that from almost every baker, chef and store owner I’ve been in contact with or worked for. And most of the time, they’re just alright, nothing orgasmic or firework-like. However...These croissants baked at the FPS were something else...

When I picked up the first croissant with my fingers, IT FLAKED! No jokes. It was so flaky on the outside, IT FLAKED. Picture this: It’s as delicate as freshly fallen snow, yah, try picking that up off the ground. This was a great first indication of a good croissant. As I proceeded to guide the finger delicate croissant into my mouth, I felt the outer layers of crispiness crumbling in my mouth and if I had exhaled, flakes of perfectly baked croissants would fly out like gentle snow flakes. And as I began to chew, I discovered layers and layers of soft, moist, buttery richness and right then, before I could finish my first bite, I was hit with a moment of silence.

“Awws shiiett...” I thought quietly to myself. By having THIS particular croissant, this wonderful, perfect, godly created piece of mastery, I knew the FPS instructors were right. And I had hated them for it. I was never going to enjoy another piece of croissant any where in the world that would come close to matching this orgasmic mouth & brain F--K. If I somehow died at a young age, *knock on wood* I hope to die with a mouthful of these croissants. Yes, I have no shame. They are just that good. Hell, I’d even make love to it...But seriously, that’s another story.


  1. thanks for the food fuckery. now i'll have it in my head that all future croissants i have will be shits in comparison.

  2. Sounds like the croissants I've had in Europe! bring good bread to us North Americans!

  3. hahaha if you're gonna die at a young age, it'll probably be because of the heart attack you're gonna be having while eating a mouthful of these buttery croisants :p so don't worry, your wish will probably come true.

    I'm kinda conflicted now.. on one hand they sound amazing... but on the other hand, I'm kinda concerned if you learn how to make these... cuz think of all the clogged arteries that you're gonna give people :P well.. at least that'll give me business/lives to save in the hospital :p

  4. What's the ratio of guys v. girls in the class?

  5. i second maria. while i'm really curious just how good this croissant is, i think it's filled with an ounce too much of guilt (and sexual references). haha

  6. wow so many gals in the class! lol!